When Husbands Make You Cry!

Sometimes husbands leave the toilet seat up. Yeah, it's actually like 99.9 % of the time, but anyway...

Sometimes husbands aren't perfect (they are human, right?). Sometimes husbands hurt feelings. Sometimes husbands fail to remember something that was important. Sometimes husbands go to bed without giving a kiss goodnight.

But sometimes, husbands melt (their wives') hearts when they become daddies.

My husband is rather laid back. He takes things as they come. In fact, one of his favorite things to say is "We'll cross that bridge when we get there." (Yes, this is a hard thing for a hyper-planner to hear from her partner!)

I suppose that is why when I see him express any (positive) emotion, I am giddy. I know this is when he is forgoing his comfort zone to be in the moment. I remember the minute our firstborn daughter entered this world--my husband shed a tear. I will never forget that moment. More importantly, I'll never forget how seeing all of his emotion made me feel.

I'm sure that all moms get giddy and excited when they see their children being loved on by their father-- this is mainly because we care that our children are shown the love they deserve. But when you are in love with that man, I think it adds a whole other level of love.

And I'm going to take a leap here and say that there is another level on top of that. This is the level where you know that your children are getting something that you never (at least not that you remember) had.

I can remember seeing Father of the Bride as a young girl (we're talking 10 or 11) and crying when the dad walked his daughter down the aisle. I think some part of me knew, even at that age, that I would never experience this. Luckily, I have my only uncle who was happy and willing to take this position.

There were a handful of Father things that I missed out on as a child because my father chose to be absent--but that's not to say that I didn't have a mom and grandma who did everything in their power to give me the love and support of two parents. Even so, there are a few cultural (and several personal) events in a girl's life when her father plays an important role.

Like telling you how beautiful you look on prom night.

Like walking you down the aisle.

Like painting your toenails when you are 3 years old.



Yes, I know this may not be one of the cultural things that dads do, but this is something that my husband recently did. And I can hardly type these words without letting a few tears form in the corner of my eyes and a lump in my throat.

Not only am I happy for my daughter to receive this attention from her father, but her father happens to be the man I chose to be with for this life. That makes me a little proud. This is also something that I never experienced with my father--this fact makes it sweet. Precious. Adorable. Really, I just want to cry (happy tears) when he does things like this.

I think, in this lifetime, we get all that we need. That's not to say that maybe we don't deserve more (in the way of love or shelter or food, not iPads, money, or jewlery), but it seems that many times, there is another source that makes up for our losses.

In my case, I had my mom and Mema who doted on me. They treasured every song I sang. They encouraged my artsy side. I felt free to express myself. Not a game of mine was missed. I was a Girl Scout. I played the piano. We went on family vacations. We made memories. Not to mention I never went without food, shelter, love or toys for that matter.


And now, after five years of marriage and four (or maybe 5, we'll see in a few weeks) daughters I feel confident that I have found the man who helps me heal in ways no one else could. Seeing him simply be a daddy to our babies heals a little part of me. When I see the joy he puts in each of their hearts, my heart melts a little each time. When I see the love in my husband's eyes for his babies, the holes that my own father left are being filled in a little at a time.

And you can bet your money on the fact that I will cry (happy tears, of course) at all of my daughters' major father-daughter milestones. Not a prom night or wedding dance will pass without my heart being a little more healed. Even the everyday things like coaching soccer (yes, Matt's serving as assistant to Peach's team), teaching the basics of bike riding, or even painting little toenails will never cease to warm my heart. Being able to witness that special bond is something unique to being the mother of a daughter (or daughters) who are so cherished by their daddies.

*Thank you, Matt, for being the first love of their lives.

*See, I told you you should read my blog :)